Discover Your Truth Unearth Your Soul
Are you kidding me? Do you think chipped teeth comments are hurting my feelings? I'm 27, my teeth have been chipped since elementary school days. My teeth are chipped right there in the FRONT for all to see. It has never stopped me; not a day in my life have I been found wanting because my teeth aren't whole.
I've been adored by many, declared beautiful by some and called cute by all but extreme haters.
I've been picked on by many, called ugly by some, and declared skinny by most.
EVERYONE is a critic, therefore EVERYONE gets to decide whether I'm pretty or too thin, and what my smile should look like. Does that sound right to you? Who are you to judge me?
Let she who is without flaws; she who is the physical epitome of beauty, let that woman who looks perfectly perfect, be the judge of me. You should not judge if you have flaws yourself, it is hypocrisy- like the way black people call the darker skinned among us "blacky" or "Tar". Does it really matter what degree of black you are? ( Your still black right?) Similarly can you really call out my flaws, without first mentioning yours? And if we are both flawed, then what are you gaining by pointing out my issues?
Nobody is physically perfect, in fact being physically perfect would be an imperfection in itself, it goes against everything we know about nature. Nature likes different, haven't you checked out all the life on this planet and noticed how different all creatures look?
Nature is full of variety, some are born with so called "better features" but is it really "BETTER" or just DIFFERENT. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder because your idea of beauty is relative to your individual taste. That is why sometimes the guy you find gorgeous your girlfriends find ugly. This is why so called "good" looking people don't all pair up leaving the "ugly" to breed amongst themselves.
You think I'm worried about looking good and you are wrong, Life is not about looks, you cannot take beauty to the bank and deposit it. Even models have to bring more than looks to the table right? I can't buy food and pay rent with my perfect front teeth now can I? So why do I care if they are chipped or perfect? Do you think my son, (who is the most important person in the world to me) cares about how perfect my teeth are? If he doesn't care then why should you? He is the only one who has to look into this face daily.
Nanny work makes you privileged to the inner workings of the health care systems for the rich. This is how it works: Mommy calls her doctor; she thinks her baby's sniffles might possibly be pneumonia. The doc for his part, humors Mom, takes her concerns seriously no matter how off her rocks Mom might seem. In other words he does the job that he is being paid to do.
Meanwhile, I have been trying to reach my son's doc for 3 days now on the advice of a letter received. I have a true health concern here, (traces of lead found in his blood) and I just want to be reassured about the situation and advised about how best to proceed. Who better to give you health care advice than your primary care physician right?
Spoke to a pediatric nurse who rudely told me to try another extension, tried it anyway, and no one answered. One person advice me to ask the nurse to page the doctor because he is not due in clinic today.
Today I called, nurse asked me if I understood that this was not a private office. I don't get it, only patients with private doctors can speak to them? I should not expect to speak to my Primary Care Provider if the office he is practicing in is not private?
Maybe its the free poor people insurance, yeah lets blame that. If I want better healthcare then I better pay for it. If patient treatment is based on wealth (who else can pay their own doctor's fee in this country) then I better get this mantra stuck in my thick skull: GET RICH OR YOUR SON WILL SUFFER.
LOVE THIS WORLD... WE'VE MADE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL PLACE FOR THE CHILDREN OF THE POOR.
What I want to know is why everyone is being so hard on this one man. His campaign words "Yes We Can" seems to have been forgotten by all who first felt inspired when he uttered them. Obama never said "yes HE can", that was not his promise. One word can change the whole meaning of a sentence can't it? Everyone is criticizing, but that doesn't really help, one man can't and thats why that man said "Yes We Can". We, everyone, all of us united can acheive anything-the world is so because we made it, so we should stop attacking and start helping. (People you know who you are Lol)
Someone close to me asked if I noticed how much time the President now spends holding his head down. What burdens this once charismatic speaker- who fired up the masses and started the biggest online grass movement the country had ever seen during an election, must face everyday, to weigh his head down?
Last night I saw a glimpse of this old Obama, the smart, charismatic and confident Obama, who had a answer for everything. He was defending the air strikes in Libya meant to save the town of Benghazi from impending genocide courtesy of Col. el-Qaddafi.
Whats wrong with America saving countless innocents from mass murder? Its actually one of the only good reasons I've heard in the last 10 years for war. I mean the decision was made to invaded Iraq instead of seeking out al Qaeda, and America has been stuck in that Vietnam like quagmire, ever since. So why don't you critics focus on fixing that mess, put all your impotent energy into that and leave the running of the county to the man the people elected. If we can invade for nonsense, on the whims of a certain drunk, then why can't the USA help Libyans who will be murdered?
For arguments sake, lets say President Obama is wrong and America will get stuck. Isn't prevention of genocide a better reason to meddling, than the search for nonexistent weapons of mass destruction?
Only time will tell how this all turns out. In the mean time Pres. Obama might not be perfect, (does he need to be?) but his heart is in the right place.
I use to wish grown ups could find a better way of describing the process of having sex. Apparently, anyone can have sex as long as they have the right tools. Parents don't need to tell kids how to have sex or when to have sex they need to tell them why.
Why are we having sex? Is it what you really want? Who created this desire, this want, to have sex? I say want because the only people who NEED TO HAVE SEX are those seeking to make a family. Looking at sex from a biological, perspective, the sole purpose of sex is reproduction.
Sex is an expression of love, so if you love someone then you should have sex right?
When we are children we beleive in the fairytales, Cinderella meets the Prince etc etc they live happily ever after. Cinderella could just fall in love with any old Prince, she could afford to do that in the books but do you really think you can pull that off in this new decade?
Lets seperate the myth, from the truth and understand that you have to THINK AND FEEL. We are no longer dumb animals, we can choose to love or not love. Choose to love and not have sex, choose to have sex when we are ready for the full consequences.
We all have to mind our own business. its just the way the world works. Each of us have family, careers and all our own personal drama to deal with. Some of have to worry about where our next meal will come from, and how we can feed our children. Some, worry about rent and paying the bills that we need to pay in order to survive. For those of of who are not in the elite 1%, life had limited choices.
I observed a mom outside of a Manhattan apartment building, picking through the recycling garbage for plastic bottles. By her side, were two children somewhere between the ages of 5 and 9, they were helping mommy.
As a mom I struggle to provide for my own child, I complain about not having enough, I wish I could give him more. I wonder how that Mom feels knowing that her children are helping her look through garbage as a way of survival. I wonder if I could live that way, and it made me want to stop complaining and be content.
My heart goes out to the people even less fortunate than I. In this world sometimes we can't help people, even if we want to, because it would be at your own expense. We live in a world where monetary riches are all that count, some of us who want to help can't because were are too poor ourselves. Give milk to another baby and watch yours starve, kill or be killed, learn to ignore the sufferings of others or perish. This is the way of the word as its been presented to me.
Is there another way? Is there humanity left among us? Have we destroyed the human chain of love that bonded us together as family? There is something wrong with this world...When are we going to fix it?
Did having his baby change my life? Am I really that special? Doesn't he have babies with other mothers? Being a mom is special, but boy do I wish I was really ready to provide that white picket fence, or maybe that little house on the beach.
Just run away from this crazy city that we live in, it sounds really great when you listen to the dream. The reality of the situation is without a diploma, a talent, or even the ability to generate an independent thought what chance do you really stand over there? Moving away or going to another country, wont really help you or your family, if you don't have a plan. Please keep in mind the innocent life/lives you are in charge of, Mom they are yours to protect.
Can you depend on his plan, just because he says so? There is a little one/ones to worry about now, a mom must always look at the whole picture. Sometimes we can't only listen to our men, and compensate their needs our children must come first. They are innocent in all our madness and we must find a way to make the best possible life for them. A man by definition should be providing and protecting for his family and putting their interest above all.
Its hard sometimes to make the right choices, especially in this life that we have created. But understand that you are a major creator in your own life. Your life is just what you have made it- the way is narrow, the rewards, divine. What ever your life is now is a sum total of past decisions that you have chosen to make, or not to make in your life. You are smart, you can figure this out, you have got a brain just like him or anyone else for that matter. Mom use that God given intelligence to change your family's life, Don't just sit around depending on him, don't get brain washed by another brilliant scheme Take back your own life and change your choices Mom, someone depends on you.
Women do not need men to survive, but little girls need a father to love them. They need to be loved first by a father, then by a lover.
A father doesn't necessarily mean the man who provided DNA, this "father" could be any man who is willing to love that girl without sexual interest,
When a girl receives love from a father he is building up her self esteem and sense of worth. He is telling her that she is capable if receiving love from a man without prejudice towards her sex. If a girl grows into a woman who is confident-who knows that a man can love more than her body and the pleasure it gives them, she is capable of analyzing any relationship and seeing it for what it is worth.
A lot of us, grow up without this male influence that is so essencial for a clever girl to grow into a wise woman. Some of us don't really come into real contact with men until we have boyfriends.
Truthfully, most of us start out in our "high school" years, with major relationships-tatoos, babies, marriages, abuse, this all happens in our teenage relationships! I mean where is the firm hand to guide our girls? Where are the gumpy dads keeping our little boyfriends on the straght and narrow? Mommy really does need help...Daddies don't forget about your daughters, they need you too.
He'a learning ABCs and 123's in spanish and english its so cute to hear him try to say cuatro lol. When Jo and Daddy get going in spanish its the funniest thing to observe. You see, Jonah doesn't really speak spanish quite yet, but you can't tell him that! He's two after all.
He is obssessed with stars, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star is a constant favorite around our apartment especially at bedtime. Daddy put up glow in the dark stars on the ceiling in Jo's room so we star gaze every night and sing Twinkle Twinkle before bed.
He loves pretend reading some of his favorite books like "The Cat in The Hat" and Sesame Street's "Nighty-Night" and my personal favorite "Please, Baby, Please" by Spike Lee and Tonya Lewis Lee. Jo loves when I read "The Giving Tree" by Shel Silverstein and we always get stuck on the parts where the word apples appears, I think he likes saying the word apples.
He officially knows how to turn on all his favorite shows using Netflix on our Nentendo Wii. I mean he points and aims like he's been doing it all his life, and we got it for Christmas. His brain is totally superior to mine, I mean its nothing for me to learn a game at 27, but a 2 year old? What will he do when he's 27?
I speak of Jo because I have the priveledge of observing him but I know there must be other parents out there thinking about this. I know their are 2 year olds using Ipods and cell phones and practically anything electronic they come into contact with, Our children can be amazing, everyone of them, if we as parents only stare then on the right track.
But what about our children? I have a 2 year old who I didn't plan on exposing to any type of radiation other than he gets from the sun. I think 2 might be too young for a chest x-ray, therefore I think its too young for trace, radiation exposure of any kind.
What are our children's, children going to live like? First Chernobyl now Fukushima and then...?
My only question is where is the best school for the parents who want their child to have a good education but cannot afford it? Is my son going to be able to compete with those two year olds if I keep him in the daycare around the corner? How can poor people break out of the cycle? Public schools in New York City are at their worst. How am I expected to produce a productive member of society when that society places such high monetary value on the cost of educating its children.
Why is education so expensive? Should only the rich have regular access to the best education? Scholarships help true, but the truth is, most poor kids are locked away from a better future. I want my son's life to be easier than mine, I want him to have more opportunities than I did. If education is the key and I can't afford it, will I have let him down? He doesn't need to go to the Harvard but doesn't a Harvard degree look better than a City college degree on a job application?
I published a post on this blog from the boston.com entitled "THE BAD MOTHER COMPLEX" by author Francie Latour. The article is describing some research work done on working moms and the guilt they feel when work life and home life becomes blurred visa vis smartphones and computers remote access to the office. There is apparently a whole demographic of working mom's who feel guilty and about not only the amount of time they spend at work but the amount of time spent doing homework.
Money is essential to survival in our society now because its the way human beings have made it. We don't actually need the object itself , we can neither eat nor drink it money. Yet we need money to buy food and drink. The need to grow your own food has been replace with the need to work to buy that food. If you don't have an income, you don't eat unless charity helps.
Modern moms either work because they have to, or work because they want to "make better lives". For the moms who are working hard on their careers to maintain their sweat lifestyles, I guess you know why you feel stressed, placing work above home is almost like putting yours need before your families. If your working hard for your next vacation, house, car, jewelry then it makes the time spent away from them less meaningful. Someone else is raising your children while you work hard for your next big check. How are you raising your children when you are not there? Room for guilt and stress yet Mommy?
For the moms who have to work you have no choice if you don't work, your children wont eat. No need to feel upset, it is out of your control. You are only a part of a systems that makes it impossible for you to survive without money. The love, hugs and kisses that you can offer to your child, you cannot offer it to the cashier at the supermarket. Some people would say that if you don't have the money why have the kids. The world has never work that way, nature assigns motherhood to us all (biologically) and the selection process is not based on money.
According to genetic scientist and their research, human beings around the world, every one of us today, all share one common ancestor originating from Africa. If we all share a common ancestor then it stands to reason that in the most minuscule of ways, we are all related. Racially differences really are superficial, a simply accident of birth. Whatever your skin color happens to be, makes you no more or less superior/inferior. Your skin color pays homage to your ancestors and how much sun their skin needed to absorb to survive. Observe that even those of us with lighter skin who work in the sun all day gets tanned. When the sun moves away from the earth in the winter your complexion "lightens", in the summer it "darkens" when the sun moves closer. Considering how many thousands of years of human migration, not to mention geological conditions and subsequent evolution our ancestors had to survive once leaving Africa, its no wonder "the races" all look so different.
I know that those who colonised, slaughtered, plundered and enslaved Africa, did not know what they were doing was the equivalent of a baby rewarding his nursing mom by biting her on the breast. Considering how the world is working today even with all this new knowledge I don't think it would make much of a difference. I don't think we ever needed science to tell us that human being are all the same. You don't need a scientist to identify different types dogs as such, and they come in a wide variety.
One day the races will completely mix out again , or human beings take another fork down the evolutionary road. Maybe we can't blame ourselves for the way we have treated and are treating each other, maybe our brains are not capable of processing such a Utopia. It is my hope that the beings who walk the earth after us learn what it is truly like to be a part of the human family.
What is it with men and competiton I wonder? As I study my two year old toddler son I notice no competion on his cute little baby face when he kicks his soccer ball around with daddy. Yet as I sit here typing his 20 something year older than him father, is sitting here engaged in a feirce battle with his male cousin. They are having a competition over who can squease a wooden aperatus with a certain three coiled metal, encircled by another peice of metal shaped in the figure eight, attached to two hard wooden barells,( "a clutch") the most amount of times, The last count was somewhere upwards in the nineties. I don't get the glee, but they have these huge grins on their faces, and they are heatedly arguing about who is, "doing the excercise the right way." Now there "strong hand is tired" from previous effort. I am shaking my head while I'm typing this.
How life can really can come full circle, you see I spent the first 25 years of my life practically surrounded by females so all this testosterone can be a bit intense. I mean with all the muscle and senew not to mention the strategizing that goes into the competion you'd think they were gladiators fighting for the right to their next breath S[eaking of gladiatiors now they are engaging in a fist fight competion OMG competion is getting fierce! One Titian just flew across the room, now I'm shaking my head and laughing because cousin got punc!ed in the eye! Aahhh, a reprieve much deserved from all the madness to which I've been subjected lol.
Mommy now understands why children, especially little boys, need their father around. I mean I don't know who would teach my son how to engage in such reckless male activity. I mean its pretty constructive in that end of the world type of way thats always looming over our heads. Who knows? Maybe doomsday looms ahead and only the strong will survive? I don't know but I think boys need to learn this code in order to succeed. For men POWER is everything, and they gain power by besting each other in competition on almost every level. Even when at play men can't help but to jocky for position. Its may be crazy to Mommy, but I guess for them its just leting off some steam.
Family seems to either work for you or against you or neither, or both... its confusing.
Our relationships with our parents are inherently flawed because they are not the perfect human beings that we wrongly expect them to be. When we are young children we think that adults must have it right all the time. As children we can't see beyond our own limited eyes, but neither can our parents.
Its not your mom or dad's fault they inherited the sum total of their parents existence and unless you stop and think about why you even do the things you do, there is no room for questioning. I question why family can be so flawed; how sisters could grow up jealous and envious of each other instead of loving, kind and helpful; how brothers turn their back on each other over money, power and women instead of supporting and building each other up.
If a baby can sense your anxiety, then what makes you think they can't sense your animosity? If they know you love them by your actions, what makes you think they don't know who you hate by your actions. Just the way children learn to eat, walk and talk, they also learn how to treat people. If you treat the people who you should be loving the most like garbage on daily basis then that is the way you are teaching your child to act! They won't know any better because they have had no better example.
As parents we should look at the way we treat our family members. If I want my child to get along with his family, then maybe I should learn to get along with the family first and lead by example?
As moms we find ours days can be filled not only with the task of managing our own lives but the live of out families. Many of us work outside the home, and truthfully even those of us who don't, still can't find the time to comparison shop. Sometimes we don't even have the time to hunt for the deal and the bargain hunting is definately a part of the thrill of shopping.
I find that the http://www.become.com/ can definately solve some of your shopping dilemas. Its a one stop shop for moms looking for useful baby items like cosco car seats http://www.become.com/cosco-car-seat-base. If your in the market for something more frivolous, find the cuttest toddler rain boots at www.become.com/toddler-rain-boots.
Moms don't forget to check out some items for yourself like maybe the Home and Garden or Jewelry section? :)
Any website that makes life easier is definately worth looking at http://www.become.com/ gets that concept.